I tried everything to save my marriage but couldn't!...

I got married last year in December to a boy of my parents' choice. It was purely an arranged marriage that was fixed via some distant relative in our family, who knew the boy's family through some common connection. After marriage, I shifted base to another city and being a Delhi girl I had a lot of inhibitions and apprehensions that how would I adjust in a small town, whom would I hang out with, what about my parents and all those bothersome thoughts. But then I prepared myself mentally that things are always destined. I got engaged in May and this being a long distant relationship, I didn't get to meet the guy much during our courtship period. It was only twice that he came down to Delhi and we caught up for a few hours. Though long late night calls became a routine, yet I did miss his physical presence and the fact that we cannot meet anytime (as per convenience) like other couples would do. Still, I would console my heart saying, never mind, it's a matter of just few more months and then I would be with him forever. The days went by slowly and the nights started seeming too long, as I kept waiting for the D-Day.

And the big wedding day came. And I must add here, it's not easy to make all arrangements in case of an out stationed wedding. Nevertheless, my parents did whatever best was possible. Two days before marriage, we went to their (my in-laws) city with my entire family, relatives and a few close friends. Everything sailed smooth and everyone went back home with smiling faces and of course after giving me blessings 'may you live happy ever after'.

As soon all the ceremonies and rituals got over and I had to move in my new bedroom with a man whom I didn't know much (who is my husband now), my mind was already over flooding with anxieties. I was nervous and at the same time excited too. Don't know why! I kept anticipating what is going to happen next. How will everything look like, so on and so forth. But I had no damn clue what was in store for me the next moment. My husband entered the room, said that he's got a bad headache, took a tablet and went off to sleep.

SHOCKED, SHATTERED and HEARTBROKEN... I almost froze for a fraction of second before I could actually realize and react to the fact that he has actually gone to sleep on the 'first night of our wedding'. Not letting any disturbing thoughts hit my mind, I too went off to sleep and decided to talk to him the next morning. Things were fine the following day, he behaved pretty normal but as soon it was night and we were alone in our room, he got another headache, gave same reasons and slept. This continued for a few days initially and I started to think that maybe it's the shyness and he's taking time to open up.

It was after a week of our marriage that I got to know about my husband's extra marital affair and that too with a girl, with whom he is in a serous relationship for last 18 long years. Yes, 18 years is not a small time. And by the way, it wasn't him to told me all this, neither I caught him red handed but it was that girl who called me up and said 'You spoiled my life. You came between us'. I didn't know how to react to what she said but I was brave enough to ask her 'then why didn't you tell me all this before our marriage? Why now?' To which she replied, she tried telling me but couldn't muster up the courage to call up. Whatever! My life was spoiled and nothing could be done.

I tried confronting this with my husband but he had nothing to say. He kept silent every time I raised questions about his past (which is still ongoing) affair. Despite all this, I didn't give up and tried to save my marriage. I took all possible initiatives to get sexually intimate with him, which one in ten times, he reciprocated to but it was all so forced. At one point of time, while making love to me, he even took that girl's name and I ignored.

A few weeks later I found a mobile phone in his cupboard, which he had only kept for calling that girl. And then I found a file that had some legal papers. To my utter shock, it was divorce petition that girl had filed from her husband. That means she was married! GOSH. I couldn't believe she had two kids too. I even found a few intimate photos of my husband with that girl. But I didn't get answers to any of my questions.

All this while, we kept planning where we would go for our honeymoon and two months later, we went for our alone time. I was hoping by all means that things would change once we are back but I was only a fool to believe that. During our 12-day long honeymoon, we had sex only twice and that too only when I insisted, otherwise he showed no sign of interest. I might be sounding ravenous for sex but I really wanted to save my marriage and show him that I love him. But all in vain!!!

We returned and things became even worse. I caught my husband secretly calling that girl while we were do